Your fun, your rules
Casual Dating Safety: Enjoy the Thrill, Keep Control
- A username, never your name
- Your town, never your address
- Block or report anyone
Casual dating is more fun when you call the shots: what goes on your profile, who you talk to, and how and where you meet.
Relax, flirt and stay in charge
No-strings dating comes with its own worries. You might be meeting a near stranger quite soon after saying hello. You might not want your dating life to be public. And scammers know that people looking for fun can be keen to skip the slow bits.
The good news is that most of it is in your hands. Your profile shows a username, your nearest town and only the photos and words you choose, you decide who you talk to and for how long, and you can shut a conversation down the moment it stops being fun. A handful of habits covers the rest. The controls come first on this page, then the advice: meeting up, sex, scams and ending things well.
Six controls that keep you in charge
These are yours from the moment you join. Use them as much or as little as you like.
-
A username, not your name
Other members see the username you pick. Your real name and your email address are never on your profile.
Why it helps Choose a username you do not use anywhere else, and it is much harder for anyone to find your social media from your profile.
-
Your nearest town, never your address
Your profile shows the town nearest to you, not your street, your postcode or your address.
Why it helps People can see you are close enough to meet without knowing where you live. You share more only when you decide to.
-
Photos you choose
You decide which photos go on your profile, and which stay on your phone.
Why it helps You can show your face and your style without showing your workplace, your front door or your car's number plate.
-
Block anyone
Block someone from their profile or from your conversation with them.
Why it helps They can no longer message you, and you do not owe anyone an explanation for using it.
-
Report anyone
Report a member from their profile or from a conversation, in a couple of taps.
Why it helps If someone asks for money, sends something you did not ask for or pushes past a no, reporting is how you flag it. Block them as well.
-
Chat on the site until you are ready
Messages stay inside Casual.uk, so you never have to hand over your number to get to know someone.
Why it helps You swap numbers when you have decided you like them, not because someone else is in a hurry.
Keep your dating life your own business
- Use fresh photos. Pictures that are already on your Facebook or Instagram can be matched back to you with a reverse image search. Take a few new ones instead.
- Mind the background. Work lanyards, uniforms, school logos, house numbers and number plates give away more than you would think.
- Keep your surname to yourself. First name only until you have met and you are happy, and the same goes for where you work.
- Get a little distance. Living close is handy, but for a first meet pick somewhere a short trip from your own front door.
- Mind your screen. If you save Casual.uk to your home screen on an iPhone, you can rename the icon as you add it. On a shared computer, sign out when you are done.
End it kindly, leave on good terms
Casual arrangements end. Someone meets a partner, someone moves away, someone simply fancies a change, and that is fine. What makes casual dating feel good rather than grubby is how people finish things.
A short, clear message beats a slow fade. "I've really enjoyed this, but I'm going to call it a day" is kind and leaves nothing to decode. If one of you has started to want more than the other, say so early rather than letting it drift. It is nobody's fault, and it is far easier to hear sooner than later.
After a first meet that did not spark, "lovely to meet you, but I didn't feel it" is all it takes. And if someone will not take no for an answer, you do not owe them a debate: stop replying, block them, and report them if they keep pushing.
Five habits that make every first meet easier
- Keep chatting on Casual.uk until you are sure you like them, and suggest a quick video call before you meet. Two minutes on camera shows they match their photos.
- Pick somewhere public and lively for the first meet, such as a bar, a café or a busy high street. Our first casual date ideas have plenty that suit.
- Tell a friend where you are going, the username of the person you are meeting and roughly when you expect to be home. A quick text when you leave works well.
- Travel there and back under your own steam, by car, taxi or public transport, so you can leave the moment you want to. Skip the offer of a lift on a first meet.
- Never send money, gift cards or travel costs to someone you are about to meet, whatever the story. A person who wants to see you will get themselves there.
Good sex starts with a clear yes
Casual does not mean careless. Talk about protection before things heat up, and carry condoms yourself rather than counting on the other person. If you are seeing new partners, regular tests at a sexual health clinic are part of looking after yourself and everyone you sleep with. NHS sexual health services are free and confidential, and many will post you a home testing kit.
If a condom splits, act quickly. Emergency contraception works best the sooner you get it, and if there is any risk of HIV, PEP has to be started within 72 hours, so go to a sexual health clinic or A&E straight away rather than waiting until Monday.
Consent is the whole point. It has to be clear, it covers one thing at a time, and either of you can change your mind at any point, even halfway through. Someone who is very drunk cannot give it. If a person pushes past a no, that is the end of the date, and worth a report. If something happens that you did not agree to, it is not your fault: call 999 if you are in danger, and a sexual assault referral centre can help whether or not you decide to go to the police.
Keep your drink with you, and do not feel you have to go back to anyone's place. Saying "this has been fun, I'm heading off" is always allowed. The casual dating rules guide covers the etiquette side in more depth.
Spot a scammer in seconds
Scammers chasing money tend to follow the same script, and the first few messages usually give them away. Watch for:
- an opener that could have been sent to anyone and ignores everything on your profile;
- big feelings, very fast, from someone you have never met;
- a job that keeps them far away, such as an oil rig, a ship or a posting overseas;
- pressure to move to WhatsApp, Telegram or text almost straight away;
- a request for money, gift cards, travel costs or bank details, for any reason at all;
- a sob story, an emergency or a too-good investment tip;
- photos that look like a model's portfolio and a refusal to video chat;
- links to "safety check" or webcam sites that want your card details.
Nobody who wants to meet you for a drink needs your money first. If anything on that list sounds familiar, stop replying, then block and report the profile. If you have already paid, call your bank straight away: dialling 159 connects you to most big UK banks, and the sooner they know, the better the chance of stopping the payment.
Block, report and get back to the fun
You can report anyone from their profile or from your conversation, and block them at the same time if you never want to hear from them again. Use it whenever someone asks for money, sends something you did not ask for, pushes past a no or turns out not to be the person in the photos. You do not need to be certain: if something feels off, that is reason enough.
If you are ever in danger, call 999. To report something to the police that is not an emergency, call 101. Then get back to the people who make casual dating fun.
Want to know more before you join? Read is Casual.uk legit, see the features that help you stay in control, or learn who we are.
Your safety questions, answered
Is Casual.uk safe to use?
You get the controls: you go by a username, members see only your nearest town, the photos are your own choice, and block and report sit on every profile. Add the habits on this page, meeting somewhere public, telling a friend and never sending money, and you stay in charge of every meet.
Can other members see where I live?
No. Your profile shows your nearest town, never your address, and your real name and email are never on show.
Where should I meet someone for the first time?
Somewhere public and busy, like a bar or café, with your own way home. Tell a friend where you will be and when you expect to be back.
Should I video call before we meet?
If you want to, yes. Two minutes on camera shows the person matches their photos and gives you a feel for the chemistry. Someone who keeps finding reasons not to is worth a second thought.
Someone asked me for money. What should I do?
Do not send anything. Stop replying, report the profile from the site and block them. Requests for money are the clearest sign of a scam, and if you have already paid, call your bank straight away.
What happens when I block someone?
They can no longer message you, and you do not have to explain yourself. If they did something wrong, such as asking for money or sending something you did not ask for, report them as well.
How do I end a casual arrangement nicely?
One short, honest message: thank them, say you are calling it a day, and leave it there. It is kinder than going quiet, and it keeps the door open for a friendly hello if you ever cross paths.